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The_Goat
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Joined: 03 Mar 2007
Posts: 3260
Location: South of France
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 Posted: Wed Jun 05, 2013 10:47 pm Post subject: The jokes thread. |
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Ok, I'll start this one.
A young White kid from a very prudish part of the American South enrols in a university and earns himself a degree in Petroleum Engineering. He then gets recruited by a big oil firm and is posted in Dubai.
The kid goes to Dubai not knowing what to expect, but soon takes to the Dubai expat circle, starts loving life and his newly found independence. He rents a big apartment and hires a Bangladeshi house keeper named Khalid, who takes care of everything at home.
A few months later the American returns home on vacation and marries his childhood sweetheart. She too is full of trepidation about Dubai, not knowing what to expect, but her husband puts her at ease saying "Don't worry sweetheart, Khalid is great. He takes care of everything. You'll live like a Queen there."
The couple then arrive in Dubai, and the lady is introduced to Khalid, whom she approves. The next day, the husband has to go to work early, so he kisses his wife goodbye, telling her again "You can sleep all you want , Sweetie. Khalid will take care of everything". Then he leaves.
After some time, the lady is woken up rudely. She opens her eyes to find Khalid standing near the bed, frowning.
"Time to get dressed and go home now, Missy!", Khalid explains.
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I don't know which is the more pampered bunch : AI's widebodies (the aunties) or Jet's widebodies (the planes).
-Jasepl |
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Jaysit
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Joined: 19 Dec 2006
Posts: 4346
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| Posted: Thu Jun 06, 2013 5:37 am Post subject: |
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| ????? |
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vivekman
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Joined: 26 Dec 2006
Posts: 1897
Location: BOM
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| Posted: Thu Jun 06, 2013 8:55 am Post subject: |
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Hahaha 
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Boeing makes planes. Airbus makes videogames! |
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himmat01
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Joined: 19 Dec 2006
Posts: 1392
Location: DEL
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| Posted: Thu Jun 06, 2013 10:42 am Post subject: |
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Good one.
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Save Maharashtra! |
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stealthpilot
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Joined: 19 Dec 2006
Posts: 2325
Location: BLR, DXB
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| Posted: Fri Jun 07, 2013 7:00 pm Post subject: |
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????
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eP007 |
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sammyk
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Joined: 20 Dec 2006
Posts: 2719
Location: Austin, TX
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| Posted: Fri Jun 07, 2013 9:10 pm Post subject: |
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| What's with the ????s ? Not getting the joke? |
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rutvij
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Joined: 22 Feb 2007
Posts: 1390
Location: Skies of Fire!
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| Posted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 9:23 am Post subject: |
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| Good One! |
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me111993
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Joined: 04 Sep 2009
Posts: 3225
Location: MAA/AMD
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| Posted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 9:39 am Post subject: |
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A naked & drunken woman boards a cab in London. Driver of the cab, a Gujju, keeps staring at her and does not start the cab.
Woman: Haven't you seen a naked woman before?
Gujju: cool down. I am not staring at you. I am just wondering where you have kept the money to pay me?
Lesson: This is what most of the American banks failed to do. Assessing the repayment capacity before enjoying exposure...
Picked this up from Yash777 back on FB
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Causal Determinism : We are hardwired to need answers. The Caveman who heard a rustle in the bushes and checked out to see what it was, lived longer than the guy, who assumed it was just a breeze.
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The_Goat
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Joined: 03 Mar 2007
Posts: 3260
Location: South of France
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| Posted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 2:00 pm Post subject: |
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Another one on morals. Old one.
A turkey had a wish. He desperately wanted to fly. Not knowing how, he asked his friend, the cow, for ideas.
"Why don't you nibble at my droppings? They are loaded with nutrients, and can give you strength", the cow suggested.
The turkey did as advised, and amazingly, he found himself getting stronger. Full of confidence, he flapped his wings hard, and took off. He then perched himself on the top of a tree. Full of pride, he sat there admiring the scene, when a hunter passed by. Finding a fat turkey on a tree, he pulled out his gun and shot it dead.
Moral: Bullshit can get you to the top, but can't keep you there.
and yet another..
A small sparrow is struggling to stay alive in winter. He is hungry, his wings are frozen, and he is lying on a field, half dead. A passing cow shits on his head. The sparrow is initially in a lot of pain, but the warm dung revives him and he starts feeling good. He sticks his head out and starts singing. A passing tom cat hears the song, and finding the sparrow trapped in dung, pulls him out and eats him.
Moral 1. The one who puts shit on your head is not necessarily your enemy.
Moral 2. The one who pulls you out of shit is not necessarily your friend.
Moral 3. and if you find yourself neck deep in shit, keep your mouth shut.
_________________
I don't know which is the more pampered bunch : AI's widebodies (the aunties) or Jet's widebodies (the planes).
-Jasepl |
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